


Us and Them

by avilio



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Friends to Lovers, High School, M/M, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Rating May Change, Requited Love, Seijoh - Freeform, Sex, Slow Burn, Unrequited Love, Volleyball, hanaiwa, iwahana, iwaoi - Freeform, matsuhana - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-02
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2018-09-14 02:37:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9154330
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avilio/pseuds/avilio
Summary: Iwaizumi is in love with his best friend, but he doesn't think he loves him back.Iwaizumi soon discovers that he has a friend with the same issue, so they find comfort in each other to get over what they believe to be unrequited love, only to cause more complications down the road.





	1. Chapter 1

“Hajime!” 

Iwaizumi turned at the sound of his name.

“What do you want, Tooru?” 

The eight year old gave him a huge smile, all his teeth showing, as he held out his hand.

“The stars are pretty tonight! Lets go!” 

Iwaizumi sighed as Oikawa took his hand, dragging him out the back door of his house. They laid side by side on the grass as Oikawa started pointing at all the constellations, informing Iwaizumi on their names.

“You see the three bright stars lined up? And the stars around it?” he asked. Iwaizumi nodded.

“That one is called Orion!” Oikawa exclaimed. 

Iwaizumi stared at his best friend. He smiled as Oikawa rambled on passionately about Orion before pointing to the next constellation, but despite all the information Oikawa was trying to ram into his brain, Iwaizumi became too distracted by the light in Oikawa’s eyes. He swears he can see the stars reflections. 

“Hajime! Pay attention!” 

Iwaizumi blinked and gave a nervous chuckle. “Sorry...” 

“Hmph!” Oikawa puffed. “Anyway, as I was saying... you think the aliens are looking down at us?” 

Iwaizumi's blank stare was answer enough. 

“Don’t look at me like that! Aliens exist! I’m sure of it!” 

“Right," Iwaizumi chuckled. 

They went into a mutual silence for a few minutes before Oikawa broke it.

“Hey, you and I will always be best friends, right?” he asked. 

Iwaizumi looked at him, surprised by the sudden question. He glanced down at their hands, which were still together.

“Of course we will, you idiot. Why wouldn’t we be?” 

Oikawa was quiet for a while, before he broke into a smile. 

“Good!”

* * *

 

“Iwa-chan!”

Iwaizumi twitched. “Stop calling me that! And what do you want?” 

“Lets join the volleyball club together,” Oikawa insisted. They were in their first year of middle school.

“No.” 

“But why, iwa-chan?” Oikawa whined. 

“Just no. And stop with the stupid nickname!”

Oikawa pouted. 

“Why can’t you just join yourself? Why do I have to be involved?” Iwaizumi asked. 

“Because, I want to play with you, too! You like volleyball, don’t you?” 

And yeah, he does like it. It’s a fun sport to play. However, Iwaizumi wasn’t sure if it was a sport he’d want to stick with growing older. He couldn’t tell if volleyball, to him, was a fun hobby or a serious passion. He told Oikawa exactly that. 

Oikawa pouted. “How will you know if you don’t at least try?” he asked. 

Iwaizumi didn’t have an answer. Oikawa stumped him on this one. He sighed, “Fine, I’ll think about it,” he said, but after seeing Oikawa’s smile, he knew he had his answer. 

* * *

 

Their last year of middle school was the most stressful thanks to Oikawa’s insecurities. Iwaizumi couldn't even begin to explain what could have happened if he didn't stop Oikawa from hurting their underclassman. It wasn’t until that moment, when Oikawa over-worked himself too much, that Iwaizumi realized how much he cared for that idiot and how much he just wanted to help him. 

Iwaizumi knew Oikawa was the best setter, but at that moment, those words wouldn’t have meant much coming from him. That's why Iwaizumi took a more aggressive route to getting through to his best friend. 

Oikawa looked up, eyes wide. Iwaizumi was pissed. 

“Do you think you're fighting by yourself?! You've got to be kidding, you dumbass!” he yelled. “There are six players on the volleyball court! Even if our opponent's some genius first-year or Ushiwaka, the team with the better six is stronger, you dumbass!”

Oikawa was silent for a while. 

Before they left the gym, Oikawa said the words, “all of a sudden, I feel invincible.” 

Iwaizumi felt satisfied that he was able to calm him down, but took a mental note to keep an eye on him. 

“Really though, Iwa-chan,” he complained, “did you have to head butt me  _that_  hard?” 

“Would you like me to do it again? 

* * *

 

It didn’t take much for Iwaizumi to realize that what he felt for Oikawa wasn’t what a regular best friend should feel. 

Every time he talks about her, kisses her, touches her... even looks at her, Iwaizumi’s blood boils in a way that can only be described as jealousy. Iwaizumi doesn’t want to hate her. After all, she’s his best friend’s girlfriend. But that’s just it, she’s his best friend’s  _girlfriend._  More proof that Oikawa would never return his feelings. 

It was in their first year of high school that Iwaizumi figured out his feelings for Oikawa, and now it’s their third year and Iwaizumi has yet to confess. Hell, he hasn’t even come out yet. He doesn’t want to ruin their friendship and scare Oikawa away. 

“You really are the perfect girlfriend!” he heard Oikawa say. The three of them were eating lunch together along with Hanamaki and Matsukawa.

The girl laughed, “honestly, you’d be lost without me."

Again, Oikawa forgot his lunch, and usually that was Iwaizumi’s queue to share his (he always had extra food saved for him) only to find that his girlfriend brought an extra bento. Yeah, Iwaizumi wasn’t in a good mood, but he was trying hard not to let that show, especially over something so small. After all, Oikawa didn't belong to him. 

“Iwaizumi, you okay? You’ve been awfully quiet,” asked Matsukawa. 

“I’m fine,” he lied.

Hanamaki gave him a look, and he could feel Oikawas gaze at the side of his face, but he ignored both. 

The bell rang, and Iwaizumi was glad to get away from there.  

 

When practice began, Oikawa’s little club had decided to come watch, one of them being his girlfriend. “Tooru! Nice serve!” they heard her scream. Iwaizumi cringed at the use of Oikawa's first name.  _What gives her the right to call him that_ , he thought. But she had every right. 

Iwaizumi was too busy moping that he almost missed a receive, barely keeping it in play. When the scrimmage was over, Hanamaki pulled him aside. “Are you sure you’re fine? You seemed pretty distracted.” 

Iwaizumi was starting to get irritated. He was happy his friends cared for him, but this was something personal that he really didn’t want to talk about. “I’m fine, just not feeling well,” he lied. He gave Hanamaki a small smile, “don’t worry so much.”

It was obvious Hanamaki didn’t believe him, but lucky enough for Iwaizumi, he decided not to press the issue.

Like usual, Iwaizumi waited for Oikawa after practice. Since they lived in the same neighbourhood, they always walked to and from school together. 

They walked in a comfortable silence until Oikawa broke it. “Is something bothering you?” he asked. 

Iwaizumi let out a frustrated groan. “How many times to I have to say it? I’m fine, nothing is bothering me,” he told him. 

Oikawa stopped walking. “You’re lying,” he said. 

Iwaizumi stopped, sighed, then turned around to face him. 

“Fine,” he said. He looked down and hesitated before he admitted he was feeling stressed lately. 

Oikawa asked why. 

“It’s personal,” he said, “nothing I want to talk about right now.” 

Oikawa frowned. 

“We’re best friends, aren’t we? We’re supposed to talk about these things,” he said.

Iwaizumi sighed for what felt like the millionth time that day. “I know, but I’m just not ready to talk about it right now.” 

“And when you are ready?” asked Oikawa. 

“I’ll come to you.” 

Oikawa’s frown disappeared, but you could tell he wasn’t satisfied. He gave a simple “okay” before they began walking to their destinations again.

“We still seeing that movie Sunday?” asked Oikawa. 

There was a new sci-fi film Oikawa was dying to see, so Iwaizumi got them tickets to go opening night. 

“Of course. I didn’t buy two tickets to see it with my mom,” he joked. 

“Good,” Oikawa laughed, “I’m excited.” 

Iwaizumi had to remind himself that it wasn’t a date. 

* * *

 

Saturday eventually rolled around, and Hanamaki and Matsukawa invited both Iwaizumi and Oikawa to hang out, whining that they haven’t spent much time together as a group. Oikawa disagreed, saying they practice together therefore see each other everyday. Hanamaki rolled his eyes.

“There’s a big difference in practicing and hanging out. It’s our final year. Before we know it, the spring tournament will pass, hopefully we’ll go to Nationals, and then graduate. We need to spend as much time together as we can!” he exclaimed.  

Matsukawa then insisted they have lunch at his favorite burger place. They sat in a booth, Iwaizumi next to Oikawa and Matsukawa next to Hanamaki. Once their order was taken they started chatting and telling jokes. Hanamaki even showed them a few memes.

Iwaizumi was having fun. He missed times like these, and although he might not admit it, he knows Oikawa has missed this too. Everything was going well until they heard a familiar laugh by the entrance. They all turned to see Oikawa’s girlfriend with someone they assumed to be her friend, both holding to-go boxes. Oikawa stood up and called out to her, and Iwaizumi couldn’t help but feel like punching him.

She turned at the sound of her name, mood instantly brightening when she saw him. She started to walk over. Iwaizumi was going to be sick. 

“I didn’t know you would be here,” she said. She introduced her friend. 

Oikawa put on his best smile, a smile to big to be genuine. “Ah! Nice to meet you!” 

The friend blushed, “th-the pleasures all m-mine!” she stuttered. Iwaizumi stopped himself from rolling his eyes. All girls were like this towards Oikawa. If only they knew what a piece of shit he really was. 

Oikawa first introduced Hanamaki and Matsukawa. 

“And this here right next to me is Iwa-chan. Be careful though, he’s an angry brute most of the ti-” 

Iwaizumi cut him off by stomping on his foot. 

“Ow! See what I mean?” 

Both girls giggled. 

“I’m actually glad I ran into you. My mom is back from her travels and she’s dying to meet you, so I wanted to know if you'd like to have dinner with us tomorrow...” she trailed off, obviously nervous. 

“What time?” 

“Eight.” 

Iwaizumi inwardly smirked. That was the same time as their movie, something Oikawa would never miss out on. 

“I’ll be there.” 

Iwaizumi whipped around and looked at Oikawa.  _Did he forget??_

She smiled, “I see you then! Oh, and try to be a few minutes early, if it’s not too much trouble,” she said. 

“You got it,” said Oikawa with a thumbs up, ignoring Iwaizumi’s glare. 

The girls said their goodbyes then left the restaurant. 

Matsukawa whistled, triggering a curious glance from Oikawa. 

“It’s only been a few weeks and you’re already meeting the parents? A little fast if you ask me.” 

“Pfft. Please, it’s perfectly fine,” he replied. 

“So you’re definitely ready to be judged?” asked Hanamaki. 

Oikawa placed a hand on his chest. “They’ll love me! I’ll make sure of it. After all, I’m a joy to be around.” 

Hanamaki scoffed. “I’d have to disagree with that.” 

“Rude! You’re just like Iwa-chan.” 

Matsukawa spoke up, “speaking of, you look like you want to say something, Iwaizumi.” 

All eyes were on him. 

“Sorry,” spoke Oikawa. At least he looked guilty. “I know we were supposed to see that movie tomorrow, but... I can’t really say no to my girlfriend, can I?” 

 _Yes,_  Iwaizumi wanted to say.  _You can say no. Pick me over her._

But he knew that wasn’t fair 

“Don’t worry about it. I understand.” 

Although it wasn’t a lie, Iwaizumi couldn't say it was okay.

“What movie were you two going to see?” asked Hanamaki. 

“Arrival,” Iwaizumi replied. 

“Oh! I’ll go with you then, if that’s okay,” said Hanamaki. 

“I do have an extra ticket,” he smiled. 

“Then it’s settled. I’ll meet you half an hour early?” 

“Sounds good.” 

“What am I, chopped liver?” asked Matsukawa. 

They laughed. 

“I doubt its sold out. Want to go?” asked Iwaizumi. 

Matsukawa grinned but shook his head. “I would love to, but I actually can’t. I have to babysit tomorrow night.” 

Oikawa clapped his hands. “Well then, I’m glad that's all settled.” 

Their food finally arrived so they dug in. 

After paying for their meals, they left the restaurant. Hanamaki left with Matsukawa while Iwaizumi left with Oikawa. 

Hanamaki waved. “See you tomorrow, Iwaizumi!” 

“Yeah,” he waved back. 

They were halfway to their neighborhood when Oikawa apologized again. 

“I really did want to see that movie with you tomorrow, but...” 

Iwaizumi’s smile tightened. “It’s fine. After all, can’t really say no to your girlfriend, can you?” 

Oikawa flinched at his tone. 

“I promise I’ll make it up to you,” he said. 

Iwaizumi let out a soft sigh once he calmed down. 

His face softened. "Honestly, it's fine. We can see a movie some other time, so don't apologize. " 


	2. Chapter 2

Iwaizumi was ten feet from the theater doors when he recognized a familiar hair of almost pink sitting in the game center. He went in and walked around the corner to where he sat, and was amused when Hanamaki jumped out of his seat as soon as they made eye contact. He smiled, waving as he greeted him. "Yo, Iwaizumi!”

Iwaizumi gave him a smile as he walked up to him, and he replied back with a simple “hey.”

“It feels like I haven’t seen you in so long,” he whined.

Iwaizumi raised an eyebrow, still amused. 

“Didn’t we just see each other yesterday?”

“Yes, but it’s not often you and I hang out. Just the two of us.”

He was right, Iwaizumi thought. Although Iwaizumi would consider Hanamaki to be one of his closer friends, they never really took time to hang out outside of the small group they managed to form. Come to think of it, Iwaizumi would spend most of his time with Oikawa more than anybody. But of course, you have your friends and then you have your best friends, so it’s only natural that you would hang out with one more than the other, and Iwaizumi was sure the same went for Hanamaki and Matsukawa. But in Iwaizumi’s case, you have your friends and then the boy you’re in love with. Iwaizumi sometimes thought that maybe his feelings for Oikawa got in the way of him spending time with the others. He wouldn’t call himself obsessed, but he knows that he would drop everything if Oikawa asked.

“You’re right,” he replied, “but we can always change that. To be honest I’m getting quit sick of being around Oikawa all the time,” he joked.

Hanamaki gave him a look.

“In the end, though, you really like spending time with him, don’t you?” he asked.

Iwaizumi couldn’t help but think there was a deeper meaning behind that.

“What do you mean?” he questioned. _Does he know?_

“Nothing~” he sang, patting his hands on Iwaizumi’s shoulders. “Now let’s start going towards the theater room, we don’t want to miss the movie,” he said.

He walked around Iwaizumi, and as soon as his brain was cleared, Iwaizumi did an awkward half sprint to catch up to him. Hanamaki decided to make a quick stop at the snack counter to get a large popcorn to share with Iwaizumi, and two drinks. He handed one to him.

“You didn’t have to, you know. I could’ve payed for my own,” he told him, but Hanamaki just shook his head. “You paid for the tickets, so please accept the drink and popcorn as a reward.”

Iwaizumi gave a short laugh, “A reward, huh?”

After getting their drinks, they walked up to the ticker taker, and Iwaizumi pulled out two tickets from his pocket, handing them both to the teenager. “Third theater to you’re right,” he told them.  

 

 

“That was a great movie!”

They were walking out of the building when Hanamaki decided to express his opinions. They leaned against the wall outside, both enjoying the cool breeze. He turned to Iwaizumi, asking what he thought.

He smiled, “It was good.”

“Nope. It was better than good,” Hanamaki said, then he smiled, “Thanks again for the ticket, by the way. Even though it technically wasn’t for me."

Iwaizumi waved him off, “Don’t worry about it. Besides, it was nice to go to a movie for once without someone constantly talking your ear off the entire time.” That being said, Iwaizumi didn’t really mind when Oikawa did it. When Oikawa gets excited, especially about movies like this one, he shows his excitement through talking. Iwaizumi wouldn’t say he isn’t a fan of sci-fi movies, but the only time he sees one is when he’s with Oikawa, and he finds himself paying more attention to Oikawa’s quiet yet passionate commentary than he does the actual movie. In fact, that's probably how he got into volleyball, he thinks. Whenever they were hanging out as kids, Oikawa would always have a volleyball in his hands, talking about the game and also trying to perfect his serve. Perhaps it was seeing how happy he was when he played that inspired Iwaizumi to want to join him, to be apart of something that brought joy to his life. 

Hanamaki cut him off from of his thoughts. “Dear God, Oikawa’s one of _those_ types of people. Why am I not surprised?”

Iwaizumi laughed. “He’s not too bad, though. I don’t mind it most of the time. The comments he makes on and off sometimes are more interesting than the movie itself.”

“Hmm, you would say that.”

Iwaizumi gave him a strange look, and for the second time that day he asked the question, “what do you mean?”

Hanamaki was silent for a moment before he spoke again, his tone completely serious.

“Iwaizumi…” he turned his eyes on to him, “how do you really feel about Oikawa?”

Iwaizumi’s eyes slightly widened, and he fumbled around with his hands. “Um…” He wasn’t sure what to say, but apparently, that said everything.

“The way look at him, and talk about him,” Hanamaki continued, “there’s always this kind of fondness, I guess, there. A fondness that suggest you like him more than what you probably want people to believe. And don’t even get me started on how you act when his girlfriend is around, Jesus fuck man, you’re so bitter.”

Hanamaki looked at him again, but Iwaizumi’s eyes were staring at his own feet.

He sighed. “Listen… I’m not trying to call you out on anything. Just know that you can tell me, if I’m right. I won’t judge you, if you’re worried about that. I’d be the worst sort of hypocrite if I did.”

Those words are what finally made Iwaizumi turn to look at him, and again, he asked what he meant.

Hanamaki locked their eyes together. “Matsukawa… he means a lot to me.”

They were silent for a few seconds, but it felt like minutes.

“Oh..” 

“Yeah. I’ve liked him, I think, since we first met? Maybe. During the beginning of high school. So, when I see you with Oikawa, acting the way you do… I don’t know, I just, notice those things? I guess." _Cause I'm going through the same thing,_ he wanted to say. 

Again, they were both silent for a while.

Hanamaki scratched the back of his head, suddenly feeling insecure. He didn't like the awkwardness that was growing between them. “Sorry!” he suddenly said. “I know this isn’t my business. I shouldn’t have said anything, I just want you to know I’m here, okay? I understand what you may be going through, so-“

“It’s fine,” Iwaizumi cut him off. “Don’t apologize.”

Once Hanamaki calmed down Iwaizumi continued. He took a deep breath, for he’s never confessed this to anyone before, not even his parents.

“I like Oikawa,” he started. “I don’t know exactly when I started liking him, but towards the end of middle school I felt that something was off about how I felt about him, but when high school started, I think that’s when I knew for sure.” 

Hanamaki nodded. 

“Looks like you and I have something in common, then. We’re both suckers for our best friends.” 

Then suddenly, Iwaizumi gave a very small smile. 

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but, I’m kind of happy theres someone who understands...” then he looked down.

Hanamaki huffed. "How could I take that the wrong way?" Then he looked towards Iwaizumi, but stopped short when he saw his face. He looked like he was in pain. 

“It hurts...” and Iwaizumi’s voice definitely sounded as if he were in pain, “seeing him with her... it hurts a lot.”

Hanamaki place a hand on his shoulder and gave it a small squeeze. “Yeah, I know. But, you’ll be fine, I think, as time goes by. It’s not just your arms that are strong," he said, trying to make light humor.  

It worked for a second, and Iwaizumi gave Hanamaki a small smile at his words, bumping his shoulder with his. But that didn't stop Iwaizumi from wanting to cry. He didn't understand why all of a sudden he wanted to let it out now. Was it because finally someone knows? That he wasn't on his own? 

Hanamaki noticed this right away, so he put his arms around him to pull him into a hug. 

He spoke, "It's fine to let it out, you know. Nothing good comes from keeping it in. I know that from experience."

And for a short while, all you could hear were Iwaizumi's choked sobs, muffled by Hanamaki's shoulder. 

A few minutes of silence passed before they pulled apart. Hanamaki suggested they hang out again, soon, to which Iwaizumi agreed. 

Iwaizumi was about to walk away before Hanamaki’s voice stopped him.

“Remember if you ever want to talk...”

Iwaizumi nodded. “Thank you,” he said, “for today... I feel better, I think. At least, for now..." He looked up at him. "So thank you.”  

Hanamaki smiled but waved him off. 

“Anytime.”

They both said their goodbyes. 

 

 

When Iwaizumi got home he laid on his bed. He felt exhausted. 

His thoughts drifted over to Hanamaki. He was surprised, to say the least. He’s known Hanamaki for three years, but he’s never known about the feelings he had been saving for Matsukawa. But now that he thinks about it, it makes sense. Those two were always close, always next to each other. Hanamaki cared for Matsukawa in the same way he himself cared for Oikawa. He thought about Hanamaki's arms, holding him. It had been a while since he cried like that in front of someone. He should feel embarrassed, he thinks, but all he feels is relief. Like a weight had been slightly lifted. Suddenly, Iwaizumi didn’t feel so alone anymore, knowing there was someone out there who he could talk to, someone who _understands_ what he’s going through. He finally closed his eyes, and let those thoughts take him to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My apologizes. This chapter wasn't supposed to take this long to write, and I also apologize for the length. I wanted this to be longer but I feel that this was a proper place to end it for now. 
> 
> Hopefully I will get another chapter done by next week! Thank you for reading.


	3. Chapter 3

It was few weeks later that Iwaizumi found himself talking more and more to Hanamaki. It was strange to him, because usually whenever he had a problem, Oikawa would be the first person he would turn to, but obviously, this was a problem Oikawa couldn’t fix. 

Oikawa noticed though. He even joked during lunch that Iwaizumi had replaced him. Iwaizumi thought he heard a bitterness in his voice, but he convinced himself he was just tired. With the spring high tournament coming up soon, Oikawa was constantly working himself at any given time, or at least, the time Iwaizumi will allow him. 

Sometime during their lunch Matsukawa decided to leave early. When asked why, he gave a quick glance to Hanamaki, then stated that he had some make up work he needed to finish. 

"You should know better than to get behind, Mattsun," Hanamaki lectured, though something in his voice sounded off, Iwaizumi noticed. 

The bell rang a few minutes later, signaling that it was time to go back to their classes. Oikawa's girlfriend dragged him off, so Iwaizumi and Hanamaki walked together. 

On their way back to their class, Hanamaki stopped. Iwaizumi took a few steps forward before stopping as well. He turned back to look at Hanamaki, about to ask what was wrong, until he noticed he was staring. Following his eyes, Iwaizumi found himself too, staring at Matsukawa who was talking with a girl by the stairs, and not doing his so called "make up work." By the way her hand was rested on his hip, they could possibly very well be more than just friends. This must explain the real reason why Matsukawa had left lunch early. 

He looked back at Hanamaki, who to anyone else would seem composed, but Iwaizumi knew the look in his eyes was anything but calm. He was hurt. 

Iwaizumi had been so busy whining about his own problems with Oikawa that he had nearly forgotten that Hanamaki was dealing with the same problem as well with Matsukawa. Iwaizumi furrowed his brow, then took a hold of Hanamaki's arm, dragging him away from Matsukawa and to his classroom. Iwaizumi, although he wanted to be there for him, did not have to right words. He didn't know how to comfort Hanamaki like he was able to comfort him. 

So instead, he told Hanamaki not to think about it too much. That if Matsukawa really had a girlfriend, he'd tell them. He wouldn't keep it a secret. He wasn't the kind of person who would do that to his friends or his girlfriend. But Hanamaki disagreed. 

"He would," he insisted. 

They arrived to his classroom, and before Iwaizumi could ask why, Hanamaki walked into the room with a "see you at practice." 

 

 

In the locker room, Hanamaki was laughing with Oikawa about something Matsukawa has showed them. Iwaizumi asked what was so funny. 

Matsukawa handed him his phone. Of course it was a meme, it always is. 

"You're awful. Honestly the worst," said Iwaizumi, despite his mouth twitching into a smile. Matsukawa always got a hold of the most offensive memes, and sometimes Iwaizumi felt bad for actually thinking they were funny. 

Matsukawa took his phone back while pointing an accusing finger. "You lie! You find it funny, admit it," Matsukawa smiled. 

"Doesn't change that fact that you're awful," he said. 

"Hm, worse than Oikawa?" asked Matsukawa. 

Iwaizumi laughed, "Oikawa's a whole different kind of awful! You're no where near as bad as him." 

"Mean! Iwa-chan!" 

"Hey, coach wants everyone to hurry up," Kunimi said, giving a pointed look to the third years. 

Again, Oikawa's girlfriend came to watch along with her friends. It took a couple soft punches, but Iwaizumi was able to drag him away so they could get started. 

"You're just jealous, Iwa-chan," Oikawa grinned. 

More than you might think... Iwaizumi thought. 

They started stretching, and it was when they were sitting down to work on their legs that Oikawa invited himself over to Iwaizumi's house. 

"I still feel bad about missing the movie, so I thought maybe I could make it up by bringing over my copy of Jurassic Park for us to watch, like we use to," he told him. 

Iwaizumi scoffed, but it was light hearted. "You mean my copy of Jurassic Park that you stole..." 

Oikawa put his hands together almost like a prayer. "I swear it was an accident! It must've fell in my bag last time. " 

Iwaizumi gave a light glare. "If it was an accident, you would have given it back three years ago..." 

Oikawa sweat dropped, but Iwaizumi smiled. 

"Of course we can watch it together. It feels like forever since we've hung out," he told him, but regretted it when Oikawa gave him a guilty look. 

He didn't have time to comment on it before the coach blew his whistle. 

 

After practice, Iwaizumi unintentionally interrupted Oikawa and his girlfriend. 

"Hey Oikawa, I left my notebook in my classroom. Do you mind waiting here for me?" They had just changed back into normal clothes. 

"I don't mind waiting with you, Tooru," his girlfriend spoke in a sweet voice. 

So Oikawa nodded. 

Honestly, she really was kind. And that irritated Iwaizumi the most. Deep down, he wanted a real reason to dislike her, besides the fact that she's dating Oikawa. But he couldn't find one. She was indeed a good person, and Iwaizumi would often feel bad for his negative thoughts. 

Iwaizumi left the gym to walk back to his classroom, book bag around his shoulders. 

"Whatever," he heard a familiar voice, before a body bumped in front of him. 

"Sorry," they both apologized, and when he looked up he realized why that voice was so familiar. It was Hanamaki whom he bumped into. He had just come out of his own classroom. 

"I didn't think you were still here," Iwaizumi started. 

"Hanamaki, wait!" he heard a voice come out of the classroom. It was Matsukawa. 

Mattsun stopped when he saw Iwaizumi. 

"Oh, hey..." 

Iwaizumi looked at the two of them.

"...Did I interrupt anything?" he asked them. 

Matsukawa was about to say something, but Hanamaki beat him to it. 

"No. Nothing," he said, before giving a pointed look to Matsukawa, "just a conversation we can finish later."

Matsukawa sighed in defeat. "Fine, be that way. I'll see you both tomorrow." 

He gave a short wave and a nod to Iwaizumi, and left. 

After a few seconds, Iwaizumi asked what happened, but Hanamaki shook his head, which didn't please Iwaizumi but he didn't want to press an issue if it didn't need to be pressed. 

Still, Iwaizumi wanted to make sure he was there for him. They're friends, after all. 

"I don't want to pry into your personal life if I'm not meant to, but, if there's a problem, which I think there is, you can talk to me." 

Hanamaki gave a small smile, "Yeah, thank you." 

Iwaizumi nodded. 

"So... where are heading off to?" Hanamaki asked him. 

"Oh, I left my notebook in my class. I was going to grab it real quick before heading off with Oikawa," he explained. 

Hanamaki offered to go with him. 

Walking side by side, they were both quiet, but once they entered into Iwaizumi's class, which was empty, Hanamaki spoke. 

"That girl with Matsukawa earlier... that was his girlfriend. That's what he and I were talking about." 

Iwaizumi was quiet for a while, and could only let out a soft "oh.." 

Hanamaki continued. "And the reason he didn't tell us is because, well... he knows about my feelings for him."

Iwaizumi eyes widened. "Wh- how?" he stuttered. 

Hanamaki looked down and played with his fingers, something he often did when he was anxious or nervous, "about three months ago I confessed to him. And well, obviously... he rejected me, like I knew he would. But my feelings for him, in my eyes, were getting so strong that I thought I had to take a chance," Hanamaki let out a sad laugh, "we were so awkward for the first few weeks, but then I finally convinced him to just pretend it didn't happen." 

Of course, that's easier said than done. 

"Anyway, he didn't want to hurt my feelings or some shit by telling me about his girlfriend. But I don't need to be b-babied, you know? I-I can handle it..." he said, but soft tears were threatening to roll down his cheeks. Iwaizumi quickly went to him, grabbing on to his shoulders. 

"Hey..." he started, but Hanamaki shook his head. 

"Really, I'll be fine, it's just... somehow it hurts more that he felt the need to keep it a secret. They've been dating for four weeks now, Iwaizumi. I just want us to be normal again," he whispered. 

"Hanamaki," Iwaizumi started, "it's going to be okay. Matsukawa is a good guy, and he probably feels guilty about rejecting you. He just doesn't want to risk hurting you again."

Hanamaki looked away, "I understand that but... he's still my best friend. I want to share his happy moments with him, because that means more to me than whether he feels the same way or not," he sniffed. 

Iwaizumi eyes widened, and realized how unfair he had been to both Oikawa and his girlfriend. Oikawa wasn't an idiot. He probably noticed his attitude before anyone else, but hadn't had the proper time to say anything. Iwaizumi loves Oikawa, and he wants him to be happy. He deserves to be happy, and if she can give him that happiness, why should he not support it? 

When Hanamaki calmed down, Iwaizumi removed his hands from his shoulders.

"You know, you're pretty great, Hanamaki," he told him affectionately. 

Hanamaki had a blank look on his face, and he blinked a couple times before an embarrased blush rose to his cheeks. He could never take compliments too well. 

"Wh-where are you getting at," he stuttered. 

Iwaizumi laughed. "Come on, we should probably get going before someone kicks us out. Plus, I'm supposed to walk home with Oikawa, he's still waiting for me." 

"Of course," Hanamaki nodded, and Iwaizumi could see the smile on his face, not that Hanamaki tried to hide it. 

They split ways when they reached the gym. Waving goodbye, Hanamaki walked the opposite direction. 

"Hey, shittykawa, ready to leave?" Iwaizumi asked as he walked through the gym doors. 

"Such a dirty mouth," Oikawa whined, "and in front of a lady too." 

His girlfriend laughed. "I'm not bothered," she insisted. 

Oikawa parted from his girlfriend after leaving a kiss to her cheek. 

Iwaizumi tried hard not to show his disappointment. After his talk with Hanamaki, he wanted to make it his goal to be there for Oikawa and his relationship.

They walked down the street.

"You two seem to be doing well," he started. 

Oikawa hesitated, "yeah, I guess..." 

"Whats wrong?" 

"Nothing, you just... never asked before," Oikawa pointed out. And he was right. Iwaizumi never showed any interest in his best friend's relationship, and he was starting to realize how much of an ass he was becoming. 

"To be honest, sometimes I feel like you don't like her, and I'm not really sure why," said Oikawa. 

Iwaizumi looked guilty. "It's not that I don't like her, I think she's fine, it's just... I don't know." But he did know. 

"Maybe I just miss spending time with you." he said, and we wasn't lying. 

"My, my," Oikawa teased, "still sounds to me like you're jealous, Iwa-chan." 

"You wish!" he said defensively. 

"It's okay, Iwa-chan! No matter who I'm with, you'll always be my number one. You are my best friend, after all." 

Iwaizumi gave him a skeptical look and asked, "can you honestly say you'd put me above your girlfriend? You did skip out on that movie," he joked. And he honestly meant it to be a joke, but Oikawa seemed to take it personal. 

"Hajime," he started. 

Iwaizumi stopped short at the use of his first name, eyes bigger than usual. 

Oikawa stared at him. "You are my number one, no matter what," he insisted, no hint of joking in his tone.

Iwaizumi felt his face burn, "y-yeah. You're mine too," he replied. Don't get the wrong idea! he shouted in his head. 

Then suddenly, Oikawa smiled. "Good! Now that that's settled, lets get on our way, yeah?" 

He pushed Iwaizumi forward.

 

 

Walking through the doors, Iwaizumi yelled for his mother. "Mom! Oikawa's here!" 

She walked down the stairs to greet them both with a "welcome home." 

"Oikawa, how are doing? How is your mother?" she asked him. 

Oikawa gave her his best smile. "I'm fine, Mrs. Iwaizumi. And she's been good. How are you?" 

She smiled. "I'm just fine." 

She turned turned to Iwaizumi. "I have dinner on the table. You're father has to stay at work another day, so there should be enough for Oikawa too." 

They both thanked her, but she waved them off. "I take it Oikawa is spending the night?" she asked her son. 

"If that's okay," Iwaizumi said. 

She gave him a nod. "Of course it's okay." 

After eating their dinner, they went up to Iwaizumi's room. Iwaizumi brought out an extra futon for Oikawa, who was currently setting up the dvd player for Jurassic Park. 

They sat together on the futon Iwaizumi laid out, sharing a blanket. Sometime towards the end of the movie, Iwaizumi felt pressure against his shoulder. He turned his head only to be met with another head, but full of brown hair. He heard soft snores. Oikawa was asleep. 

It was strange to Iwaizumi, how often this would happen with them. Sometimes Iwaizumi thought that they already acted like a couple, despite the fact that they are not a couple. 

Iwaizumi frowned, then carefully moved Oikawa's head off his shoulder and laid him down across the futon. 

He got up to turn off the tv, but before he went to his bed, he couldn't help but stare at Oikawa. 

Iwaizumi couldn't help but think about how beautiful he was when he slept. and how relaxed he seemed to be. 

He thought about Hanamaki, about how he had confessed to Matsuawa, and about how he seemed to regret it. He didn't want to have those same complications with Oikawa. 

Crouching down, Iwaizumi moved a piece of his hair back behind his ear, and even though he knew it was a bad idea, he placed a kiss to the top of his head. 

Oikawa didn't stir awake, and he looked just as peaceful as before. 

Iwaizumi gave a sad smile before moving to his own bed, trying not to dream about the boy next to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter took so long. Life kind of got in the way a bit. 
> 
> Thank you for reading and I hope to get the new chapter out as soon as I can!


	4. Chapter 4

It was a Saturday night, so Iwaizumi had wanted to stay home and study for his chemistry test coming up in two days, but Hanamaki decided against that.

"You have to come over tonight," he insisted.

Iwaizumi just asked why.

"Because," began Hanamaki, "we used to hang out at my house all time, just the four of us, and we haven't done so in five-ever. We are graduating this year and may or may not see each other again, so how dare you be so insensitive to my plans." 

"Fine," he agreed, with a short laugh. If there was one thing he learned in their three years shared together, it was that Hanamaki was impossible to argue with, so he wasn't about to go through the trouble.

"Great. See you soon!" exclaimed Hanamaki, and Iwaizumi could easily imagine the smile that spreads across his cheeks despite the fact that he can't see him. 

After ending the call, he got out his duffel bag in preparation for staying the night. He sent a text to Oikawa, asking if he wanted to walk together. While he waited for a reply he made his way over to his mother's room and gave one short knock to her door. After hearing her call to walk in, he opened the door but remained in the door frame, watching as she sat on the bed doing something on her computer. Games, he supposed. She had that look of intensity mixed with concentration on her face.

"Is it okay if I go to Hanamaki's house?" 

"Are you spending the night?" his mother asked, eyes still trained on her computer.

He shrugged. "Probably. The other guys will be there too." He didn’t need to specify who exactly “the guys” where to his mother.   

She looked up at her son and smiled. "Of course you can, but if you aren't planning to stay over please be home by ten?"

"Yeah," he agreed, "and I'll text you a confirmation when I get there."

She nodded. "Have fun, okay? You've seemed kind of down lately..."

He avoided her gaze, feeling slight guilt over the fact that he made his mother worry. "Sorry, with school and volleyball things can get to be a little much sometimes, you know?"

"Hm, but try to enjoy it," she said, then suddenly her expression turned sullen. "It'll be over before you know it. My man is finally growing up," she joked.

"Mom.." he whined. 

She let out a hearty laugh. "Now go, have fun with your friends. Tell Tooru I said hi."

“Of course.”

Iwaizumi closed the door before walking back to his room. He picked up his phone from the bed, opening his messages to see an exclaimed "Yes!" from Oikawa. He quickly packed his bag with clothes for tomorrow and a tooth brush. He didn't bother packing pajamas since he usually just crashes in whatever he's currently wearing at the time. 

Walking to his best friend's house, Iwaizumi found him leaning against the mailbox, waiting patiently. His head perked up when he heard foot steps approaching. "Iwa-chan!" he grinned. 

Lips turned upward, Iwaizumi asked if he was ready. Oikawa just patted the bag resting against hip, hanging from a single shoulder strap. "Yup!" 

The walk to Hanamaki's was, at the most, about twenty minutes away. Those minutes Oikawa and Iwaizumi spent talking about anything and everything, with occasional insults or jabs thrown in. 

Finally reaching the door, Oikawa was the one who knocked, and they could both hear the patter of foot steps make their way to open the door, revealing both Hanamaki and Matsukawa. 

“Bout time you two showed up,” said Matsukawa with a lazy grin. Hanamaki, however, looked disappointed.

Noticing the look on his face, Oikawa and Iwaizumi just kind of looked at each other, confused.

“What?” Oikawa asked Makki.

“Thought y’all were the pizza guy, and I was really excited, cause I’m dead ass starving right now,” he explained.

“Rude,” Oikawa huffed, “I’m way better than the pizza guy. Now are you gonna let us in or…?” he made a weird gesture with his hands.

“You’re allowed in, Iwaizumi. Screw you, Oikawa,” he said. Iwaizumi just laughed before making his way inside, with Oikawa trailing from behind. After leaving their shoes by the front door, Matsukawa threw his arms around their shoulders leading them to the living room. Iwaizumi and Oikawa dropped their bags on the floor before sitting on the couch to make themselves comfortable. Oikawa asked what kind of pizza they got. 

“Pineapple and corn,” said Matsukawa. 

“Disgusting,” said Iwaizumi. Oikawa had the face to match that comment. 

“He’s kidding,” said Hanamaki, “we aren’t animals. We got macaroni and mayonnaise.”

“See, now this is exactly why I didn’t want to come tonight,” Iwaizumi said. 

Hanamaki gave him a loud laugh.

“I’m Kidding! I’m Kidding!” he insisted.  “Two large cheese for us three,” he gestured to himself, Mattsun and Oikawa, “and a medium meat lovers just for you. Talk about disgusting.” 

“I’ll never understand why you guys hate meat lovers so much… but thank you.”

“It’s gross,” started Matsukawa. “Too much on one pizza.”

“Yeah, Mattsun can’t handle that much _meat_ ,” joked Hanamaki, which earned him a slap to the back of his head from Matsukawa. Iwaizumi was pleased to see that they were back to a joking manner. After last week, he was nervous about the two of them hanging out; scared the air around them would still be awkward and tense. However, things appeared to be fine. Maybe they talked about it? His thoughts were interrupted by the ring of the doorbell. Pizza was here. Hanamaki was, to say the least, ecstatic. The poor boy wasn’t joking when he said he was starving. While eating their pizza, none of them touching Iwaizumi’s, the boys took turns battling it out on Mario Kart. Iwaizumi, of course, won every battle.

“How the hell are you so good at everything?” mumbled Hanamaki.

Iwaizumi smirked, “It’s just the way I was built. Not my fault you’re one of the unlucky ones.” 

Then, there was a look stricken across Hanamaki’s eyes. Iwaizumi knew exactly what it meant. They both rushed to the table in the middle of the room and leaned their elbows against it, grabbing each others hands.

“Arm wrestling again? Aren’t you tired of losing, Makki?” asked Oikawa. 

“ ‘m not losing this time,” he said. 

Matsukawa placed his hand on top of theirs. “One, Two, Three…” he counted, “Go!” he exclaimed as he let go of both hands.

Within six seconds, Iwaizumi was declared the winner. “That’s my Iwa-chan!” exclaimed Oikawa, which gave Iwaizumi a light blush. Hanamaki wasn’t displeased, however. In fact, he looked happy.

“What are you smiling for?” asked Iwaizumi. “I won.”

“Yeah, but I held on for six seconds. SIX! That’s the longest one yet. You’re weakening, Hajime!” And he looked so proud. Iwaizumi found it kind of… cute?

Oikawa had this jackass smile on his face, “Maybe if you spent less time counting and more time concentrating on your technique, you’d win.” 

Hanamaki pointed an accusing finger on him. “Shut it!” he exclaimed. “S’not like you could beat him either. OR me. You’re all ‘technique this, technique that’. The REAL test is strength.”

“Yeah? Let’s go then. My technique against your strength,” challenged Oikawa. 

“Oh, now this I have to see,” grinned Matsukawa.

Iwaizumi moved from his spot to let Oikawa sit down. 

Matsukawa placed his hand on Oikawa’s and Hanamaki’s. “One, two, three…. GO!”

In less then three seconds, Hanamaki faced his third loss of the night.

Matsukawa tried, but he couldn’t hold in his laughter. He was dying, and the distraught look on Hanamaki’s face was not helping. 

“Told ya,” said Oikawa with that annoying smirk on his face. “Technique is more important than strength.” Then he turned to Iwaizumi with a glint in his eyes. 

“No,” he said.

“Whyyyy,” Oikawa whined. “Are you scared?”

Iwaizumi huffed. “Fine, but you’ll regret it.”

Iwaizumi moved towards Hanamaki’s spot. Hanamaki just silently moved over, still in shock that he lost to Oikawa, but once he realized what exactly was going on, he lightened up.

“Iwaizumi, this is the one time I’ll root for you,” he said.

“Still bitter, I see,” muttered Oikawa. Hanamaki just winked at him. Who winked?

“Yes! The fated battle! The one we’ve all been waiting for!” exclaimed Matsukawa through his laughs. He place his hand on theirs. 

“One, two, three…Go!” 

They both held on till their faces were red. Matsukawa had stopped his laughter, realizing that this wasn’t a quick battle. Him and Hanamaki watched with intense interest, desperate to see who will walk away as the winner. 

Within fifteen seconds, they were both making strange noises, trying to push the other down. Then suddenly, it was like a burst of strength had just hit Iwaizumi, and he used all of this force to push Oikawa’s arm to the table. Both of them were breathing heavily at the end of it. 

Oikawa smirked, “I guess no one will ever be a match for my Iwa-chan.” 

 _What’s with all this ‘my’ crap?_ Thought Iwaizumi, thanking God his face was already red, making it easier to hide his blush.

“That was amazing,” squeaked Hanamaki. 

“You all are monsters,” said Matsukawa.

 

* * *

 

The night slowly starts passing by as the boys spread their bodies across the living room floor, talking about random things. Their team being one of them. “I heard from Yahaba that one of our little babies is becoming a man,” brought up Hanamaki. They asked what he meant.

“Kindaichi had his first kiss the other day.”

They all perked up.

“What?!” exclaimed Oikawa. “Who?? And why would he not tell me??” 

“Oikawa, why the fuck _would_ he tell you, of all people? And to be honest, I’m more surprised he didn’t brag to Iwaizumi, if anybody,” said Hanamaki.

“Me?” he asked. 

Matsukawa jumped into the conversation. “Iwaizumi, the kid like, idolizes you.” 

Hanamaki snorted. “The whole team idolizes you.”

Iwaizumi didn’t know how to react to that so he just let it go. “That still doesn’t explain why he would tell me.”

Hanamaki shrugged. “Make you proud? I don’t know. First kisses are a big deal to a lot of people.”

“Who?” Oikawa repeated. 

“Don’t know. Yahaba doesn’t know either. He just over-heard them talking about it.”

“Them?” asked Matsukawa. 

“Kindaichi and Kunimi… No, stop with the face, Oikawa! He didn’t kiss Kunimi! He was just telling him about the kiss.” 

“Hmph,” began Oikawa, “I’ll get it out of him one way or another.”

“Leave the kid alone, he probably gets way too flustered about these things,” Matsukawa told him, then said, “man, good for him though, I guess. I remember my first kiss.” 

Hanamaki giggled.

“Shut up.” 

“Why is he laughing?” 

“Mattsun?”

Matsukawa sighed. “It was horribly embarrassing…” 

“Please explain,” insisted Oikawa. 

“Fine. It was during fifth grade,” he started, “and there was this girl…” another giggle was heard which Matsukawa purposely ignored. “She was really cute and me being me I decided to just… do it. So I went up to her and said she was ‘the most beautiful girl I had ever seen’, then I kissed her on the lips. It was after she punched me that I realized she was a _he_.” 

All three of them burst out laughing to the point where they had tears in their eyes.

“Dude,” started Iwaizumi, “how do you make that mistake?”

“To be fair, he had the most beautiful, shiny black hair that I had ever seen. The funny thing is, we ended up becoming friends after that. I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing now, though. It’s been so long.”

“I bet he thinks about that kiss every day,” said Oikawa.

“He better. I put my heart into that one,” he laughed. “What about you, Oikawa? When was yours?”

He grinned, “Kindergarten. Mines not as embarrassing as yours, but I did miss the first time. We went in and hit each other’s nose.”

“Boring,” said Hanamaki. 

“Yeah? What about yours?”

“More boring. I, unlike you both, had a perfectly normal first kiss.”

“When?” asked Oikawa. 

“Second year of middle school. Good times,” he nodded.

Then there was silence around the room, before Hanamaki looked over to Iwaizumi. “What about you, Iwaizumi? When was yours?"

Iwaizumi had been overcome with anxiety at this point. He had been dreading this since the topic first came into view.

“Come to think about, I don’t even know this,” said Oikawa. He sounded a little depressed not knowing about his best friend's first kiss. “Keeping secrets, Iwa-chan?”

“Really? In that case, what’s your super embarrassing first kiss story, Iwaizumi?” asked Hanamaki with a shit eating grin. 

“I uh… um…” he started, “I actually… haven’t had it yet…” 

The three looked at him. Hanamaki was in disbelief.

“What?!” he exclaimed, then sensing his discomfort he tried to lighten the mood. “How? I mean,” he gestured to his body, “look at you. There’s no way people wouldn’t jump all over that.” 

Iwaizumi shrugged, cheeks red from embarrassment. “I don’t know. Guess I just haven’t been that interested?” he suggested. _Nobody has had that sort of interest towards me, maybe?_ He thought. _Maybe I’m just too awkward. Maybe nobody wants me. Maybe I’m just too hung up on Oikawa to notice anybody else-_  

“There’s no need to be embarrassed, Iwaizumi,” said Matsukawa, interrupting his thoughts.

“Yeah. You’re saving it from someone special. That’s good. Whoever it will be, they should feel pretty fucking lucky when it happens,” said Hanamaki.

“First kisses are overrated anyway,” said Oikawa, leaning back into his hands. Then he looked over at Iwaizumi. “Seriously, it’s not that big of a deal.”

Iwaizumi nodded.

Matsukawa clapped his hands, ready to change the subject. “So about Mr. Ishikawa….”

“Ugh, no, don’t even get me started on that jackass,” said Oikawa.

Mr. Ishikawa was a teacher they all had a mutual hate for.

 

 

A couple hours went by and soon they were all passed out on the living room floor. All except for Iwaizumi, who had woken up to use the bathroom. After washing his hands he opened the door, but jumped back a bit, not expecting to see Hanamaki standing on the other side.

“Sorry,” he said, hands up like he was trying to catch him. “Just wanted to pee.”

Iwaizumi nodded, “you’re fine." 

Before he could make his way to the living room, Hanamaki grabbed on to his arm to stop him. Iwaizumi looked at him with an eyebrow raised up, as if asking him what’s up. Hanamaki looked down at his toes. 

“I, um, just wanted to apologize about earlier with the whole first kiss thing. I didn’t mean to put you in that position.” 

Iwaizumi gave him a soft smile, “It’s fine, really. You didn’t know.”

“It’s really not a big deal,” he said, "not having it yet. Perfectly normal."  

“Yeah, but, I don’t know,” Iwaizumi started, turning to face Hanamaki properly. “It would be nice to get it over with. Kind of pathetic to graduate high school without having kissed anybody, right?”

Hanamaki shook his head. “It’s not,” he assured him. But Iwaizumi was in doubt, Hanamaki could tell. Then, he got an idea. 

“Wait in my bedroom real quick.” 

“Um, why?”

“Because I really don’t want to suggest this in front of a bathroom while I’m doing the pee dance,” he stated.

“Suggest what..?” but it was clear Iwaizumi had an idea, judging by the way his eyes started to widen. 

Hanamaki looked away with a rising blush. “We’ll talk about it in my room…” 

He nodded before turning to make his way there while Hanamaki used the bathroom. 

 _He’s going to suggest we kiss,_ thought Iwaizumi as he sat on Hanamaki’s bed. Does he want to have his first kiss? Yes. Does he want it to be with Hanamaki? No. There’s one boy in particular he wants to save it for, but that was a part of his problem. He can’t save one thing for someone he can’t have. _Get over it_ , he told himself for the hundredth time. Would he mind kissing Hanamaki? That was the real question. And the answer? No, he wouldn’t mind kissing him. So he asks himself again. Does he want his first kiss to be with Hanamaki? He liked Hanamaki, and has grown close to him these past few weeks. But does Hanamaki want to kiss him, or is he just trying to ‘help out a friend’? _It’s just kiss! Why am I making a big deal out of it-_  

He heard the door creak. The subject of his mind walked into the room, stopping to stand awkwardly in front of him. “Hi,” he said. 

“Hi.” 

“… so um, what I wanted to suggest was that maybe, uh…”

“…maybe you could kiss me?” he finished for him.

Hanamaki nodded. “If you want.” 

Iwaizumi decided to ask him a question that had been bothering him since he walked into the room, “Do you actually want to or do you just, feel bad?” 

Hanamaki blushed before playing with his fingers to give him something to do, something he often did when he was nervous. “I’m never kidding when I say you're nice to look at. And I wouldn’t kiss someone out of guilt. I want to kiss you,” he declared, “but only if you want to kiss me.”

And he does. At this moment, he really wants to kiss him. With a shaky grin, he says “you’re not exactly bad to look at either.” 

Hanamaki let out a small laugh, then walked towards him. Iwaizumi took this as his queue to stand up. They were both so nervous, Iwaizumi more so than Hanamaki. 

“I guess I’ll let you be in control? Just this one time,” said Iwaizumi.

Hanamaki grinned. “Duh.” Then his eyes turned serious, as if he didn’t want to screw this up. Somehow, that made Iwaizumi relax. 

He gently took Iwaizumi’s head into his hands, leaning forward. One hand stayed on his jaw while the other took hold of his neck. Iwaizumi closed his eyes, nervous, but also excited for what was about to happen. Hanamaki stopped just a few inches away from Iwaizumi’s lips before closing the gap. Iwaizumi lifted a little when he felt the pressure of Hanamaki’s lips against his, his mind going blank. All he could think about was how _good_ he felt. After a couple seconds, he tried to kiss back, not exactly sure what to do. Hanamaki sensed this and took control, gently biting his bottom lip. Iwaizumi let out a soft sound that made Hanamaki’s knees go weak. 

They pulled apart after a couple seconds. It wasn’t until he opened his eyes that Iwaizumi realized he was holding on to Hanamaki’s shoulders, hands clutching his shirt. 

They both stayed silent, only quiet breathing could be heard.

When they both calmed down and their faces returned to their normal color, Iwazumi cleared his throat. Hanamaki looked at him, not that he ever looked away in the first place, desperate to hear what he had to say.

“That was… pretty awesome,” he said. 

Hanamaki laughed, “Better be. I’m a pretty good kisser.” 

Iwaizumi licked his lips, “yeah, I could tell.”

Hanamaki choked, then tried to cough it out.  

Confused, Iwaizumi asked what happened.

“Nothing, nothing, just didn’t expect you to be so honest,” he blushed. “We should probably go back to bed.” 

Iwaizumi nodded his agreement, but before they left the room he thanked him.

“Trust me, it was my pleasure,” he said, then he thought _… I'm pretty fucking lucky._


	5. Chapter 5

A couple days had passed since the sleepover, but Iwaizumi couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss he shared with Hanamaki. That night before sleeping, his fingers would constantly brush over his own lips, burning the kiss into his memory, and this week was no different. During lunch, practice, in the halls… Iwaizumi couldn’t even look at Hanamaki without feeling his cheeks burn. The strange thing though, to Iwaizumi, was that Hanamaki seemed to be having a similar problem, leading them to the situation they were currently in.

Hanamaki had Iwaizumi backed up against the lockers in their gym locker room caught in a deep kiss, tongue exploring his mouth. Their heated kiss, however, was interrupted by their teammates. As soon as they heard voices, they both jumped away from each other, Hanamaki turning to his own locker to calm down. Iwaizumi could only try to do the same.

Their teammates walked in, and both Hanamaki and Iwaizumi said their greetings. The team didn’t notice anything weird or off between the two, which allowed Iwaizumi to let out a silent sigh of relief.

As their teammates complained to each other about classes, Iwaizumi caught Hanamaki grinning at him. He grinned back.

This started happening more often than not whenever they were left alone. However, kisses soon turned into small touches, and Iwaizumi worried that feelings where involved, but Hanamaki assured him it was purely physical. “I just like kissing you,” he had told him, “sometimes I can’t control my hands. I’ll stop if you’re uncomfortable.”

But Iwaiuzmi just shook it off, thinking that as long as they knew where things stood between them, there would be no reason to stop.

Iwaizumi gradually began to touch him back. However, one night at his house, where they should have been studying, Hanamaki decided to go a little further. Iwaizumi couldn’t stop his breath from jumping when Hanamaki’s hand trailed downward and into his pants, and somehow that triggered Hanamaki to back away.

“I didn’t mean to go that far,” he apologized.

“No, it’s fine! Really,” Iwaizumi started, “you just took me by surprise.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to do anything you’re not comfortable with,” he said.

“It’s fine,” Iwaizumi insisted.

Iwaizumi pulled Hanamaki back in for a kiss then took hold Hanamaki’s hand to move it back down.

Hanamaki broke the kiss, but didn’t move away. “When did you start getting so bold?” he asked, lips brushing against Iwaizumi’s with every word.

Iwaizumi wasn’t sure why he wanted this so bad. Maybe he was just horny, maybe he was still trying to forget about Oikawa. Maybe both. Probably both. But he chose to go with the first one.

Hanamaki laughed.

“I can help you with that,” he said.

* * *

 

Throughout the next couple of weeks, it was clear to Oikawa that Iwaizumi had grown closer to Hanamaki, and it bothered him. He knew it was childish, but jealousy was an ugly trait of his. A part of him worried that they were getting a little _too_ close, but he left that thought alone. It wasn’t right to assume as much, even if Hanamaki gave Iwaizumi those eyes. The same eyes Oikawa saw him give to Matsukawa when he had a thing for him. The same eyes Oikawa gave to Iwaizumi when he wasn’t looking. The same eyes Iwaizumi gave Oikawa when he thought _he_ wasn’t looking.

Oikawa knew there were feelings involved with himself and Iwaizumi. However, he did his best to step back and stir those feelings away. Iwaizumi was the most important person in his life, and he’d be damned if he ever let something bad come between them. But maybe that was just an excuse. Perhaps he was just scared. Scared of loving his best friend, scared of change, scared of everything that came with loving him. No girl or boy could ever come close to his feelings for Iwaizumi, not even his current girlfriend. It was stupid thinking, he knew, but now thanks to his insecurities it might be too late to fix things.

But it also might not be.

Hanamaki and Iwaizumi aren’t clear about their relationship, so it wouldn’t be fair of him to think otherwise. He’ll just have to worm his way back in.

He walked over to Iwaizumi and Hanamaki, interrupting their conversation.

“Iwa-chan! Study session tonight? My place?” he asked.

“Oh, I was actually going to Hanamaki’s to study,” he said, pointing to him.

Oikawa was not irritated in the slightest (well, maybe a little).

“In that case, lets study as a group!” he exclaimed. “We can even invite Matsukawa. After all, you wanted to hang out more as a group before the year’s over, right, Makki?”

“Ah, yeah! Sure. That’s fine,” he agreed. Oikawa didn’t miss the side look from Iwaizumi.

“Perfect. Right after practice sound good? We can all go together,” said Oikawa with a bright grin.

Makki nodded. “Yeah. I’ll tell my mom to bake cookies. She’ll be happy to see the guys altogether again,” he smiled.

When he walked away to his fish out his phone from his locker, Iwaizumi tugged on Oikawa’s shirt.

“What’s your deal?” he asked.

Oikawa blinked. “What do you mean, Iwa-chan?”

“Don’t play dumb, I know that tone and smile of yours. It’s fake and unpure,” he explained.

“Iwa-chan! My smile is always pure! How dare you even suggest such a thing,” Oikawa dramatically said.

Iwaizumi just rolled his eyes.

“Really, I’m fine! I just want to spend time with my three best friends. Is that too much to ask?”

“No, but- “

A whistle blew.

“Everyone circle up!” yelled the coach. And thus, practice began.

 

“I don’t know why coach is making us go so hard with the spring tournament so close,” complained Matsukawa. The four of them were scattered around in Hanamaki’s room, getting absolutely no studying done.

“It’s because it’s so close that we _should_ be working so hard,” argued Oikawa.

“Yeah, but we don’t want to go into it with tired legs. Yes, we need to work harder these next couple of weeks, but we also need our rest. We can’t be so sore all the time,” Matsukawa said.

Iwaizumi scoffed. “This one doesn’t know the first thing about rest,” he joked, pointing his thumb up at Oikawa.

Oikawa sat up from his spot on the bed. “Shut up. I’ve gotten better,” he mumbled.

Iwaizumi laughed. “Yeah, yeah,” he said sarcastically, but then turned his eyes on him.

“I know,” he told him, sincerely this time.

Oikawa had to fight off the blush that was threatening to rise on his cheeks.

“You’re a fucking monster, Oikawa. Of course you wouldn’t understand us low level servants,” joked Hanamaki.

Oikawa pouted before crossing his arms like a child. “Whatever! You all are the worst. I’m going to bed early,” he said before turning away from the group.

“Um, excuse you, who said you were staying the night?” asked Hanamaki. But Oikawa already knew he was planning on letting them stay.

“Me. You’re grand king,” he said proudly. 

Hanamaki grimaced. “Isn’t that what the shrimp from Karasuno calls you? That’s even worse,” he said. 

“I prefer monster,” spoke up Matsukawa.

“Me too,” agreed Iwaizumi.

Oikawa pointed an accusing finger at Iwaizumi. “Iwa-chan, you’re supposed to be on my side!” he exclaimed.

 

The rest of the night was filled with joking (everyone ganging up on Oikawa) and delicious homemade cookies before the boys fell asleep. Oikawa battled Hanamaki for the bed, saying he deserved it after all the “emotional abuse” he had to endure. Hanamaki was too tired to fight him so he, Matsukawa, and Iwaizumi stayed on the floor.

A couple hours later Oikawa woke up groggy.

“…need to pee..” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

He moved off the bed, careful not to step on any of the three teens on the floor. However, two of them were missing, allowing Oikawa to walk a clear path to the door. Oikawa looked back over to Matsukawa, all the while wondering where the other two could have gone.

He walked down the hall to the bathroom but stopped when he heard voices. They sounded like they were coming from the living room. He tip toed over to the open doorway, staying against the wall. From here he could see Iwaizumi sitting with Hanamaki on the couch. They were laughing about something before Makki cupped Iwaizumi’s cheek. Dread filled Oikawa’s stomach once he realized what was about to happen.

His assumptions were about to be proven true.

Hanamaki’s lips captured Iwaizumi’s, but it wasn’t until he watched Iwaizumi kiss back that he realized he fucked up.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this was late.   
> Long story short: I forgot my own plot (but its all good now)
> 
> [Come say hi!!](http://dazaii.tumblr.com/)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I'm actually really excited to upload this. I think this is my favorite chapter so far. 
> 
> A couple things:  
> This chapter will be in Hanamaki's POV and for anyone who was wondering who Kindaichi's first kiss was... you're about to find out!

Hanamaki was fucked.

Things weren’t supposed to go this far. He was only supposed to kiss Iwaizumi once. He wasn’t supposed to keep going or try and get physical, and he definitely wasn’t supposed to develop feelings for Iwaizumi. But he couldn’t stop himself. When Iwaizumi asked him if there was something more, and threatened to stop because of it, Hanamaki knew what the panic inside him meant, but he forced out a lie. And now here he is, weeks later, torturing himself even more by kissing him again.  

Iwaizumi pulled back, but not too far, allowing Hanamaki to continue rubbing his thumb back and forth across his jaw.

“I really like kissing you,” he admitted.

Iwaizumi made a noise at the back of his throat, not really knowing how to respond.

“You too…” he said awkwardly. Hanamaki laughed.

“We should probably go back to bed,” said Hanamaki, but not before pecking Iwaizumi’s lips once more.

Iwaizumi agreed before moving off the couch to head back to the room. Hanamaki watched him leave for second, thinking to himself that he needs to end whatever this is between them. He already had his heart broken once, and he’s not so sure he’s ready to go through that again. However, when Iwaizumi turns back around to raise a tired eyebrow at him, hair a mess from his fingers, Hanamaki can’t help but feel like it might be worth it. What a fool he was.

They walked back to the room and heard some shuffling. He looked over to where Oikawa was sprawled on his bed.

He leaned down as Iwaizumi went back to his spot on the floor.

“You awake?” he whispered.

Oikawa turned with what looked like red eyes, but in the darkness, he couldn’t really tell. Hanamaki assumed he was just tired.

“Bathroom,” he mumbled. “Where were you two?”

Hanamaki smirked. “Midnight snack,” he said, and he just _knew_ Iwaizumi was rolling his eyes without even looking over to him.

Oikawa nodded before turning away. For a minute Hanamaki thought something might be wrong but passed it off. It was the middle of the night, after all. He laid back down and shut his eyes.  

 

 

“I found out who Kindaichi kissed,” mentioned Hanamaki the following monday.

“From who?” questioned Matsukawa.

Hanamaki gave a devilish smirk. “I forced it out of Yahaba,” he confessed.

“Why does he know and not me?” whispered Oikawa, but it lacked his usual spite. Before he could comment Matsukawa shoved at his shoulder.

“Well? Are you going to tell us or not?” he pushed. Hanamaki paused, but then suddenly worried how Oikawa would take the news considering he seemed to be in a depressed mood already.

“I’ll give you a hint!” he exclaimed. They all groaned. Hanamaki laughed because he knew how much they hated the guessing game. They’ve asked him multiple times to stop, but considering he’s the only one who digs up all the information, he’s free to do what he wants.  

“Wait,” said Iwaizumi, “I thought Yahaba didn’t know?”

Hanamaki shrugged. “ _Apparently_ Kindaichi accidentally said a name the other day during practice. He mentioned it to me, so I forced him to say who.”

“And?”

“Before I answer, don’t say anything to anyone about this. There’s a reason he doesn’t want it spreading. And _no_ judging on who it is,” he gave a pointed look to Oikawa, who just raised a brow. “I’m only telling you guys because I know none of us will get on his case about it, and as his seniors I feel it is our duty to make sure he’s protected.”

“Was it a guy?” asked Oikawa.

“Yeah,” Hanamaki affirmed.

They all nodded in understanding, not saying anything else, so Hanamaki raised a finger.

“First hint!”

“Ugh,” Iwaizumi let out.

“He doesn’t go here.”

There was a collective hum from the other three as they thought of who it could be.

“Do we at least know who he is?” asked Iwaizumi.

Hanamaki nodded.

“Volleyball player?’ asked Matsukawa.

Hanamaki nodded again.

“Which school?” questioned Oikawa.

Hanamaki was torn between waving it off, claiming it’d be too easy to guess so he could keep the suspense going, or just telling him. Even though it didn’t really matter, considering he’ll be pissed in the end anyway. He didn’t want to make his mood worse by being an ass, so he decided to answer his question. 

“Karasuno,” he answered. He held off a grin when the realization hit Oikawa’s face, his depressed state switching to something even more distraught.

“Are you fucking kidding me!?” he yelled.

“Shh! Keep it down,” he spoke, trying to calm him down.

“ _Tobio-chan_??”

“Yes, yes, now stop yelling,” he tried.

“The _audacity_! The _betrayal_!” continued Oikawa.

“Was it really Kageyama?” asked Iwaizumi.

Hanamaki nodded.

Iwaizumi sat back, the palms of his hands holding him up. “Good for him,” he inquired.

Hanamaki wasn’t sure which one he was talking about.

“So, are they like... a thing?” questioned Matsukawa as he rubbed Oikawa’s shoulder to calm him.  

“I have no idea how far the relationship goes,” he said, “nor do I care,” he lied.  

“I guess it could be like a Romeo and Juliet situation,” joked Iwaizumi.

“Nope,” said Oikawa, arms crossed. “I refuse to let this happen.”

“Aw, come on now Tooru, let’s not let hatred get in the way of our young lovers,” grinned Hanamaki.

“Gross.”

“Please don’t get on Kindaichi’s case about this. I know you and Kageyama have some kind of… bad blood, but this is their business. Not yours,” said Matsukawa.

And then, as an afterthought, Hanamaki added, “And no teasing either! He obviously doesn’t want people to know, and for obvious reasons.” He understood that all too well.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” he said airily. “The good in this situation is that Kindaichi finally kissed someone,” he shrugged.

“Kageyama too, I’m assuming,” said Iwaizumi.

Oikawa stiffened before letting out a huff. “Maybe. Who knows,” he trailed off. Iwaizumi raised a brow.

“Now all that’s left is Iwaizumi,” said Mastukawa enthusiastically, patting his back. Iwaizumi flushed.

Oikawa let out a strangled laugh, which caused all three heads to turn.

“Yes, Iwa-chan. You _still_ haven’t kissed anyone,” he said bitterly.

Confused by his behavior, Hanamaki tried to change the subject by bringing up today’s practice plan but was interrupted by Iwaizumi.

“What do you mean by that?” asked Iwaizumi, voice hard. Oh boy.

Oikawa shrugged. “Nothing,” he said, “I’m just stating that you haven’t kissed anyone yet. Not one single person. Nobody at all.” His eyes hardened as they landed on Hanamaki. _Oh_ _boy._

“U-uh,” he was saved when the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. Oikawa got up before any of them and headed inside.

“What the hell was that about?” asked Matsukawa.

“Who knows? He’s been in a sour mood all day,” said Hanamaki. And now he understands why. “We should get to class. Come, Iwaizumi,” he said as he pushed him forward, leaving a very confused Matsukawa behind.

“He knows,” Iwaizumi panicked as they walked down the stairs.

“Duh.”

_“Hanamaki.”_

“Sorry. Look,” Hanamaki started, stopping Iwaizumi by the end of the stairs and lowering his voice, “it’s okay. He’s mad we didn’t say anything, but he’ll get over it.”

Iwaizumi accidentally let a whine escape. “It’s not that,” he said, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. “He doesn’t know,” he stopped to look around, “He doesn’t know I’m gay,” he whispered.

Hanamaki gave him a sympathetic look before taking both of Iwaizumi’s hands in his, inappropriately pleased to see him flush at the action.

“Listen, Hajime. You and Oikawa have known each other your whole lives. He isn’t going to judge you for this. That is, assuming he doesn’t already know,” he explained. Iwaizumi squinted his eyes at him.

“Don’t look at me like that! You know how perceptive he is,” he defended.

Iwaizumi’s shoulders slumped. “I know he wouldn’t judge me for this, he’s not that kind of person. It’s just, I feel bad,” he looked up to properly face Hanamaki. “I should’ve been honest with him from the start. I’m not sure why I wasn’t. Maybe I was just scared of telling him because… because…”

“… of your feelings for him?” Hanamaki guessed.

Iwaizumi nodded. Hanamaki couldn’t help but feel a sharp pang at the action. _Not now,_ he thought.

“Maybe it’s time you two finally had that talk, yeah?” he suggested.

Iwaizumi panicked again. "I can't tell him how I feel yet!" 

Hanamaki flinched at the word 'yet'. 

"Not that," he continued. 

Iwaizumi stopped, then huffed. “You’re probably right, then.”

“I always am.”

“Please don’t flatter yourself,” Iwaizumi deadpanned.

Hanamaki chuckled, before looking down to where his hands where still holding Iwaizumi’s. He flushed.

Iwaizumi took his hands away before faking a cough to hide his blush. “We should probably get back to class.”

Hanamaki nodded. “Yeah,” he said as he scratched the back of his head.

Before he could step away, Iwaizumi pulled at his arm to stop him.

“Hey…” he started.

“Hm?”

“… Thank you. For everything.”

Hanamaki widened his eyes a little, before letting out a nervous chuckle. “There’s nothing to thank me for,” he insisted.

Iwaizumi rolled his eyes before leaning up to land a brief kiss on Hanamaki’s lips. “Seeyouatpractice,” he rushed before walking away, leaving a stunned Hanamaki behind.

Hanamaki brushed a thumb over his lips, letting out a soft smile. _Those stupid butterflies are back,_ he thought. He was about to turn back towards his class, but a movement up the stairs caught his eyes, so he forced himself to stop. He watched as Matsukawa turned away to walk back up the stairs to the second floor. Hanamaki stood there for a second. _So he knows now too_ , he thought. He nodded. _That’s good. He sees I’m moving on._

But there was a small voice at the back of his head saying he wasn’t, not really. Not by making the same mistake all over again, just in a different way. 


End file.
